sigh. i skipped ballet yesterday. yichieh oso left for taiwan ytd. while people were at ballet sweating their asses off, i was at home trying to find a video so that i could put on the blog and trying to talk to everyone from oneSY who came online. today, i skipped ballet once again. cos both days i lost my voice and my flu isnt getting any better. even if i went for lessons, all they did would have just been free work. and i will earn numbness in my butt and perhaps discomfort of the lower back as always.. but today, my parents brought my sister and i out. how ridiculous. going out when i lose my voice. a really smart choice hurh.. we went to raffles city. gosh. the last time i stepped into raffles city was like 2003's christmas holidays.. at first i wanted to eat at subway.. but knowing how stingy some people are we ate at the food court instead and guess who i saw thr.. my secfour dance senior CHERYL. the same one i had jumped over countless times for the dance concert in july this year. omg. but luckily she din see me. hahs. i finished lunch early.. while they were still eating, i went to browse at CDs in sembawang. gosh. the place was so boring. they lacked a LOT of CDs.. sigh. then they came to look for me.. apparently they wanted to go to tt Robinsons departmental store. as usual.. my father bought a whole load of shirts while i jus got myself bored there. then i complained abt them always visiting departmental stores and they call it shopping. wow. then we walked into some shops.. when my sis and i entered precious thots, i found tt soft toy raccoon i had gotten for her birthday.. lols. after walking for quite a while my sister started whining. i had nothing better to do. hahs. in the end, we stopped by at haagen-dazs and had a few ice creams. i recommend the raspberry sorbet!! hahas. i ate the waffle thing while my sis and my mother shared this banana thingy. lols. after that, we went home. so in all, we din really buy much stuff.
hmm. I WANT A NEW PHONE. sigh. my phone's dying on me. it has already died quite a few times last time when alisha called. it died not because it was on a dead batt, but bcos it dreaded me switching it on. gahs. and it's scratched.. like really SCRATCHED.. gosh. and it's not even a colour fone. arrrggghhh. my father joked abt giving me his phone. but like come on.. my phone may be much OLDER but i'd rather use mine than his cos mine's more user-friendly. his phone pisses me off cos it really sucks in terms of speed and clarity. and it's HUGE. lols. oh wells. i guess i'll have to stick to this phone of mine till dono when..
yayy. the long awaited school holidays are here. two months. enough to drive myself crazy. i want to catch harry potter's 4th movie and perhaps sky high. elaine, deb, tf and i wanna go canoeing. and perhaps watch tf and nat capsize each other's boats! hehs. and not forgetting jia ying, zi wei and ruici's birthday. they're on the second november, thirtieth november and seventeenth december. gahs. oh yeahh. it's still not confirmed if i'm going to melbourne at the end of the year. hahs. and i need to READ during the hols. gosh. there's so many things to do. gahs. ahh.. i'll let things come when it's time. sigh. before we know it, sch's gonna re-open again.. i wonder which class i've dropped to.. SIGH

goodbye oneSY. u're the bestest. ((:

kinda screwed the talentime today. but heck. we enjoyed ourselves. especially sticking flowers into our hair for disney theme category and messing danielle's hair so she'd look more Tarzan-ish. yesterday after practising at cheryl c's friend's, joel, house. i got lost again!! hahas the 2nd time in the same month. i took the correct bus but in the wrong direction.. apparently alisha told kelly and she laughed her head off when i apologised for being late. arh heck.

i dun feel like typing a long blogpost today. i wasted 45 mins typing and then retyping the blogpost on my class blog just because i stupidly and carelessly deleted the whole thing i had typed. tell me, how PRO-DED can i get? oh yeahh.. i scrubbed of the glitter stuff.. i guess you get quite sick of it after a while. so sorry jeannette. wasted ur glue.

sigh. it's the last day of school but i don't feel elated. cos i wun get to see oneSY together again. even if we had a class gathering, things won't be the same don't you think so? gahs. maybe it's just me being paranoid. who know's what the future may bring. sigh.

and my sore throat. i thought it was better already. in the end? i sound as though i'm losing my voice or even breaking my voice now. hmm.. i'm not going for ballet tomorrow. not that i dont want to.. it's just that alisha's not going cos of TK open house and i'm not feeling well. gahs.

anyways, goodbye oneSY. you'll be in my heart, yes you'll be in my heart. from this day on, now and forever more.

hahs. i'm still sick and i skipped sch.. i wldnt mind going to sch.. but if i went bck to sch there wldnt be anything to do but to practise for the open category. so might as well stay at home and recover faster. i woke up like at eight this morning.. i had nothing else better to do so i went online. only one person talked.. that was jia yi. how unexpected. lols. i think he's like suffering from jet lag or something after the flight he had been on yesterday. hahas. aniwaes, not long after i went online, my sis had to go bck to sch.. exam day!! and then i wanted to get to the doc's to get an MC and my mother decided on going to look for a new washing machine because it had gone kinda kaput. hehs. it was raining.. i wouldnt have minded the weather if i was at home.. but walking to tns and then to parkway? gahs. my feet were so.. eurgh. when we reached parkway, the first thing we did was to top-up my mother's phone card.. at the same time, i browsed at some cell phones on display. obviously only the nokia ones caught my attention. hehs. afterwards, we went to giordano so that i could get a black shirt for talentime. a PLAIN black shirt. the ones i had were like imprinted with stuff.. hahas. in the end, we bought three shirts.. one red, black, and green!! lols. then we went up to Best to look for a new washing machine.. finally she decided on this Panasonic washing machine. dammit that place was damn bloody cold.. or maybe it was me feeling unwell. hahas. then she finally talked abt something that i totally forgot about.. A NEW RADIO. hehs. since she was in a good mood, might as well go get a new one ((: after looking at a few, i finally found one i like. something that doesnt use knobs to set radio frequency. hehs. wat's great was it comes with a remote control. hehs i'm so lazy.. sadly, it was black and BLUE. sigh. and it came with a hefty price.. one hundred and thirty-nine bucks!! that's like.. almost three times the price of my previous one. but obviously this works better than the one i bought last year when i was sick too. hahas. i remember still, that i had bought it on the swimming carnival day when most people were at the chinese swimming club hahas. funny hurh. lols. after that, i rushed back to the doc's. one day MC.. actually it was supposed to be two days - today and tomorrow. but i din wanna skip sch tmr cos i promised van and cheryl c. i'd turn up tmr so tt they can practise at cheryl c.'s friend's house. hmm. the doc looked kinda reluctant but she wrote a one day MC after all.. she said if i develop a fever, i cant go bck to sch.. so if i have fever, most likely i'll have to skip talentime too. OH NO. then i wun get to see oneSY and mrs fernandez again!! sigh. van and i had smsed her yesterday. hahas. according to her, she wun be bringing dana along.. i guess so.. cos most likely dana would cry when she hears too much noise when we cheer and everything.. hehs. sigh. flu medicine makes me drowsy. and i'm supposed to take them thrice a day? that's crazy.

life so damn rocks.. sniff the sarcasm.. sigh. i'm SICK. so sick that i dun think i can go to sch tmr.. but oneSY's working their butt off practising so intensely for the open category.. today, the sec fours had their Os chem prac.. so we couldnt practise at gallery-one nor the amphitheatre cos of NOISE pollution. hehs. so they practised outside the classroom. then we went through a bit of the Disney item.. the after recess, miss quek came in to do some weird stuff about history. goodness me.. it's AFTER exams mann.. so far only two teachers have stepped in with a mind to teach. sigh. how can they do this to us?!?! hahas. after her 20min lesson, we could do whatever we wanted to.. excluding breaking the rules. hehs. then we had to go off for some stupid assembly with mrs phuah. my class was so blur that we headed off to the khoo audi. hahas. then we remembered tt we were supposed to go to the lecture theatre instead. gosh. we were laughing mad. the whole assembly could have just sent all of us to sleep.. actually most of us did sleep. mrs phuah was talking about storybooks and she told us some "bedtime" story that sent some of us to sleep.. i fell asleep when she was doing the review of some story.. i slept at the beginning of that review and when i woke up, she was abt to wrap up the conclusion. hahas. and after school.. a lot of us din wanna go for dance. for me i have a reason.. i'm SICK. now, when everyone's at BALLET, i'm at home blogging, wondering how they're being tortured by kelly and all hehs. stupid sore throat. i doesnt hurt when i speak but when i drink it hurts like crazy.. and the funniest thing is that i don't even sound DIFFERENT. how queer. quite unbelievable that i'm sick. i need to recover. QUICKLY. the talentime's FRIDAY. van and i just SMSed mrs fern earlier today.. and she replied hahas. according to van, she says that mrs fern isnt gonna bring dana along. aww. how sad.. hahas. pfft. the SE people and their electrical guitars. grrrrr.. hahas. so thursday's the full dress rehearsal thing.. and then after that the one's playing for the open category have to go over to cheryl c's friend's house so that we could actually have a real drum and try out the whole thing. then sooner than we know it, Friday will come and go. and that will be our last day in oneSY'05. isn't that sad. unimaginable that how attached i have become to oneSY. but i'm not gonna cry. i never do. cos we'll still see each other next year. and besides, nothing new will come if you don't let go of the past isnt it?

it's a monday again. sigh. din really do much i guess? we practised a lil of the open cat then we had to go off to the heritage room. gosh. i tot it was going to be another event like boring, droning history lessons-like. but in the end, it turns out tt i was wrong. i din knw scgs had moved three times.. i thought just once cos i heard a lot only abt the old sch at emerald hill road. and the trivia abt chalks and chalk dust. it was quite interesting. but the musty smell gave us a hard time. after tt, we slacked a bit then went on practising again. she's so indecisive. if she goes on like this, by friday, we'll all die for our Disney theme. and frankly speaking, i think your idea is kinda childish. immature. cos having too many actors means we'll have less people singing, so we won't be heard from far. and she wants to play the guitar for the open cat? oh i mean come on, seriously. neither you nore willa can change your chords fast enough. and since the three singers can sing without me playing the melody then i'll just play the accompaniment larhs. then willa won't have to worry and we'll have less a burden, [you], to carry. but knowing your character, we don't want to say it straight to your face cos your immaturity will make you hate us for not letting you play. you may think we're obstructing your way to FAME or some other but face it, do you seriously wanna embarrass yourself and the rest of the class by screwing up the whole thing? and i think that the alternate chords thing is simply ridiculous cos it's such a waste to have so many people on the stage when we cant lessen the number of people. and HELLO. the dancers need space to actually DANCE. eurgh. am i so ever disgusted with you. and i cant believe you said that we didnt give you a chance. when we were practising the open cat couldnt you like start off your disney thing instead of playing some childish games? oh god the horror. and you still push the blame on US for using too many people for the open cat. cldnt you like have PLANNED it before being so fickle-minded and changing your ideas the moment they are in the midst of being finished? eurgh. i'm ever so DISGUSTED. oh and i'm so sorry van. i totally forgot it was your birthday today so i din give you birthday wishes. so here i go : HAPPY BIRTHDAY VANESSA ((: so halfway attempting to play jecolia's cello, jecolia shouted. guess who popped by.. MISS TEO. hahas. she gave a few pointers to the dancers.. like not to smile cos the song itself wasnt like some kind of cheerful lalalala song. yeahh.. she stayed for like abt half hour plus and then went off again. after school, i accompanied elaine to far east to find a long flair skirt for her so tt she could wear it for talentime. we ate at subway. i like TOMATOES. hahas. after like walking into ten over shops, she finally settled on one brown skirt and then we went home. when she was looking for her skirts, i received a few smses from jia ying which made me really depressed. then i took 162 and alighted at plaza singapura. and when i got down the bus with this freezing slurpee in my left hand, someone called out my name. guess who!! RUICI!! hahas. she was wearing her specs. AT LAST. i thought i would never see her in them ever again. i showed her the depressing smses jia ying had sent me earlier today. SIGH. so we took the same bus home. on the way home, we went past boardrick and tk. then we were talking about who we've seen on the bus before and we got really retarded. the coulds are gay. wow. oh btw, i have a new friend to add to my psychosis list - jia ying. sigh. what the hell is happening. blood. the source of satisfaction. i'm feeling sad. very sad. sigh. what to do? how to do? sigh. i need to get offline soon. i need to fetch my sis frm tns and then go for ballet. SIX TIMES A WEEK. it's nuts. SIGH. and here's on really retarded hypothesis i came up with. the bespectacled ruici is much better then the one without spectacles. i know it sounds stupid. but she is more like the old ruici when she wears her glasses. sigh.

it's another saturday once again. the stupid aircon leaked again. gahs. it destroyed the first page of my sketchbook. bloody hell.. then i had to send my sis for ballet.. gahs. i din dance. slight headache and my throat was sore.. even though you could hardly hear a difference in my voice. gahs. aniwaes, melanie, germ and jia jia took our class today. we learnt quite a few things for the grdseven's work.. compared to ms lee's speed, they were very fast. anyways, after ballet, betris alisha and i had lunch at parkway.. betris also bought a tongue-stud for her friend and i got this pair of black loop earrings. hmm.. after that, we walked around isetan cos we had nothing else better to do. alisha and betris tried on like many pairs of shades.. and then we continued walking towards the exit. before we got out, there was this section of isetan which was dedicated to halloween. weehee. halloween is coming!! all the masks and horror make-up. lols. oh yeah.. betris and i liked the witches' costume.. the purple one's top looked like a corset.. and the black and red one was simply awesome. damn. hehs. and alisha wanted fifty bucks to buy those halloween masks and stuff. gosh -.-'' by the time we left it was already quite late. but who can be so freaking bothered. sigh.
oh by the way ruici. it's not that i wanna be mean or something. you have to accept that you have changed. jia ying and i don't wish to destroy our friendship with you just because of that.. but the way you carry yourself nowadays, it makes us feel far inferior. you can say we're overreacting or plain being paranoid but face it. there's much more i want to say but i've promised her not to aggravate whatever damn condition you're in and however you're feeling.
okayy. today yichieh and the whole group of people dancing for the talentime went costume-shopping today. actually not costume.. just uniformed clothes for the talentime so we wun look so messed up. aniwaes, according to yichieh, it didnt really work out well bcos they looked for bright-coloured clothes while yicheh and elaine preferred dark-coloured clothes. frankly speaking.. i think dark-coloured clothes would be more appropriate becos the song we're using has more of a melancholic feel to it than some happy cheerful blah blah.
enuf complaining now. i'm not really in the mood for blogging today..

i'm in mortal peril. okay. i'm exaggerating. so the talentime thing is in exactly one week's time. OH NO. let's name the people performing for the open category. vanessa, cheryl c, and chiying are singing. natalie and davinia are playing the violin. jecolia is playing the cello. willa's playing the guitar. danielle is playing the drums. so for the instrumental part we have nine people. and for dance we have yichieh, deborah, gek, sandra, heather, karina and elaine. so that is another seven people. so altogether we have SIXTEEN people performing for the open category nxt week. OMG. that's freaky. we practised like mad these past few days. we finally decided on the choices of songs. we're doing Here I Am by Marion Raven for the open category and You'll Be In My Heart by Phil Collins for the Disney Theme. hmm. foo ying's taking charge of tt disney thing but i dun think we're gonna finish it in time by the way she's putting off all preparations just for looking for actors. sigh. the open category thing is coming along quite okayy.. i jus finished writing the notes on cassi's manuscript book for jecolia's cello part and identified the chords for willa's guitar part. now, i'm stuck at home doing the notes for nat and dav's violin parts. and me? i'll have to improve the speed for piece when playing on the piano cos apparently i'm too fast. hehs. and danielle is simplifying the drums.. easier on her i guess? anyways, willa has to figure out chords now and jecolia has to figure out when to play while the the others are doing their own stuff. kind of cheryl's friend to lend us his house next thursday so that we can practise before the performance together. i think tt's important cos there are many details not heard in the piano piece cos tt bloody piano in sch isnt working properly.. the notes are all DEAD. frigging hell. anwaes, yichieh wld be busy choreographing or may be re-choreographing some parts of the song. sigh. everyone's so busy!! and i feel a um.. freeloader? nevermind.
okayy so there we go. the whole talentime thing. 1SE's doing Do That Thing You Do by the Wonders.. and Reflections by Christina Aguilera for Disney theme.. i'm still trying to figure out wat that song has to do with being a class. damn it's so sad. cos next week will be the last five days together as oneSY. that's really bloody sad. even though those ppl are lyk really SMART, but they're NICE. i dun usually say this but i do think i would miss them. of course the most unforgettable is of course oneSY's winning streak in most of the inter-class competitions. and the disney song isnt helping. it's making all of us sad. oneSY will be in our hearts. makes sense? hahas. i still wanna lament about how fast time has passed since the first day i stepped into oneSY. the memory of oneSE is already so distant. i noticed that i havent said this before. so now, i shall declare proudly : I AM PART OF ONE SINCERITY 2005. sigh. i'm SAD. now i know why i'm sad. i guess i won't be able to see many of them much often anymore.. OH NO. :( sad. sad. sad.
okay for today, apart from practising, we had to watch this stupid thing with mrs phuah [vice principal]. so bloody bored then. but we found out abt quite a few horror stories about the old buildings before moving to dunearn road. the facts were quite interesting.. but the way she said it, it made it sound as though she was doing oral. hehs. oh by the way. it was my sis' birthday yesterday. come on. she's already got her birthday present!! grr.. oh and ms lee went crazy yesterday. she did the queerest of things yesterday.. like pointing the middle finger as a joke and talked about the grossest of stuff. goodness me. all of us were like STARING at her in shock at her. i guess it's the pre-flight nerves. hahas. she's gone off to shanghai for some dance stuff. hahas. she did seem quite worried yesterday. darn. the whole class had been pointe class.. and now i now have a stupid blister on the last toe of my left foot. gahs. and there's class later.. AGAIN. with the seniors supervision this time. i wonder who's taking us. hehs. and i dun think i wld wanna go en pointe later. SIGH.
oh yes um ruici. i dun fucking care if your exams are over. i cant be bothered. u wanna gloat then go fuck up other tagboards. i dun really wanna see anything about you finishing ur exams on my tagboard. besides, you've got your own blog. keep ur comments to yourself. it's damn annoying to hear about exams when you're halfway enjoyng the post-examination freedom. seriously, it's not as fascinating as you think it is.

omg, time passes so quickly. it's already a week after my EOYs while ruici is still getting killed by it. hahas. sigh. so i got back all my results by yesterday. and for lit, i've got one added mark.. so i've got 68.8% for the paper. and for chinese, the most unexpected. i actually passed it. thanks to my composition, cos i failed the main paper wit 51/110. sigh. i think me and chinese papers are hopeless. sigh. as for geog, it's really unexpected. i passed it with a B3. dammit. i'm SAD. cos i could have gotten an A2 if i had 0.6% more. goodness me.
aniwaes, sch ended early today. it's supposed to end at three but it ended at 1340 instead. interesting eh? lols. the talentime thing's next friday. not that i wanna complain but i dun think the class is gonna win in this state cos they all seem so.. uncooperative.. maybe it's bcos we havent been doing inter-class competitions for quite long already.. how sad. and the other classes are bent on beating SY bcos of our results in the interclass debate, chinese talentime and sports day. sigh. vanessa tan, YOU'RE INVOLVED. so bloody involved!! hahas. so u're not OUT. geddit? okay nvm. she took lyk 3 of my piano books lols.
okayy, ballet classes are on like almost everyday. sigh. that is, with the exception of ONLY wednesday. how pathetic. i'm gonna stretch till my bones crack. gahs. i don't know what's wrong but i've been feeling sad lately. could be the overdose of hyperness for the past few weeks. i'm SAD. someone tell me why. i'm feeling sad. sad. sad. nothing seems to be going right. lyk today van and i tried to get the gallery but 1PE was using it and the piano sucked. and for the music room, mrs goh wasnt in sch. and we cldnt use the piano in the hall cos of O lvls. really, really pathetic. and for some reason when it rained jus now, yichieh, elaine and i smelt blood. BLOOD. god dammit. and when we listened to the radio which we brought down frm the staff room, stupid songs were played on it.
sigh aniwaes, i've had enough. my brain's exploding. i dun want to have anything to do with the choreography for the talentime. yichieh can go handle it before i burst any vessels in my brain. and maybe van can do the piano thing. sigh. i scared kena play wrong note or phrase or plain mess up the whole thing. GAHS. aniwaes, i wonder if anyone would strongly object to us inviting mrs F back jus for that last day of sch. hahas.

ooh. it's my hundered and twenty-fourth blogpost. lols. this is getting kinda lame isnt it? aniwaes, ms lee's thinking of everyday class. she even had a schedule ready for us ytd. the 4.5hrs long class wasnt such a killer after all yesterday. aniwaes, sch resume to normal hours today. hmm. the whole day through we were going thru our history, science, maths and literature papers respectively. damn. my maths is disappointing. i was kinda hoping tt i wld get higher. actually i think i could if i had a little more time to check.. so here are the results. history - 60% ; science - 66% ; maths - 80% ; lit - 66.3%. the subjects i'm really more than satisfied with are lit and history.. cos i thought i wld get lyk abt 55% plus but in the end i had 60% arnd there. GOOD ENOUGH. yeahh ((:
so tmr, we're getting our killer paper and the language papers back. i dun think i'm gonna do good for geography. i think it's almost hopeless. sigh. as for chinese, all i ask for is to PASS it. damnit. just let me PASS my chinese paper for once. i'll be thrown into express if i dun pass it.. tt means i'll have to do chinese in JC too?! OH NO, THE HORROR. oh goodness. I.NEED.TO.PASS.IT. sigh. so here we go.. tmr i'm getting those last three papers back.. and after sch, CCAs resume to their usual timing.. DANCE. sigh. i dun feel lyk going for ballet after dance tmr. it's lyk i'm gonna rush nuts again. bsides, it's the monsoon season.. it's raining lyk there's no tomorrows nowadays..

FRIDAY'S OVER :( gahs. i had to fetch my sis to sch as usual.. then met alisha outside tns. then we took a bus to the eunos MRT station then we took the MRT to TM. actually i wanted to check out century first but she said by the time we got our stuff the show would have already started. blearghs. so TM we went. CORPSE BRIDE is so damn funny. but victoria kinda freaked her a bit lols. aniwaes, this coffin chain thing that we got from our popcorn combo, i took it. lols. after that we checked out century for lyk 5 mins and then headed for her house. so pai seh. her mother, sis, shanya and her bro-in-law were at home. lols. dammit alisha. ur comp hangs lyk MAD. hahas. then when i had to leave. i made her accompany me till we reached the bedok interchange lols. oh come on. i dono how to get thr mah. cannot arh. hehs. soon my next bus came.. and so did hers. guess wat. her bus stopped to the right of the bus i was on at the junction. lols. i cant blif she din see me until i called. LOLS.
as for yesterday, there was ballet as usual.. but it was on the 3rd level. i hate that bloody place.. where you keep smelling baby wipes. gahs. aniwaes, so we had grade fives to eights. imagine how packed that place had been. darn. you could hardly do a battement tendue let alone a grand battement. thank god when we had to do grand allegro we could go back upstairs. the wonderful less ying floor made it easier to jump hahas. anyway, after ballet, alisha and i went over to parkway cos i wanted to get smthn for my sis' birthday which is in four days. then we were hanging around gift image looking at soft toys cos it had birthdays tagged onto their ears lols. funnily, i found nadine/dana's, han ren's, my brother's, my sister's and my own birthday hahas.. and a whole bunch of fourteens -eurgh. aniwaes. my sis' one was a raccoon. i had nthn else better to do and bought it. hahas. and now she's lyk sleeping with that furry thing. lols. dangit. i'm sensitive to those furry stuff. had a hard time sleeping with that bloody sensitive nose. ARGH. but who cares.. she lyks it aniwaes.
hmm. okay, for today, there's class again. SIGH. wait. thy shalt not sigh. i WANT class.. aniwaes, class is supposed to end at abt wat? FIVE today and it starts and one-thirty. funny hurh. goodness. suffocation.
before i go, Happy Birthday Alcinda.

marking days!! gahs. how intriguing. i'm boring myself to death. who frigging cares.ahhh. exams already over. i feel so.. un-stretched. ponned ballet on sunday and tonite no class still. gahs. i'm sad and restless. i'm now lyk a living mess. textbooks, worksheets piling in my room and i cant be bothered to pick them up and arrange them. somehow, i'm loving the holidays but hating them too. there. i contradicted myself again. bah.aniwaes, i seriously cant wait till tmr. CORPSE BRIDE. dang. counting backwards drives you nuts. the next thing i know i'm gonna count HOURS. sigh. alisha's at netball prac, nad and ruici still in sch ppl are disappearing and i cant be bothered to talk. everyone's OUT on this beautiful thursday. sigh. and i'm STUCK at home. why? bcos i cant go out. wah. frigging unfair. sigh. i shall have my share at fun tmr. gahs. who knws. it may rain again tmr. rain rain come again, i really want you to stay. bah. staying on the computer for too long drives you nuts. eeks. the song believe me by fort minor's ringing in my head. gahs. i'm losing my sanity. dang.gross. the song my humps by the BEP is on th radio. wth. sick. gross. sick. gross. damnit. since when did i guess so affected by this kind of lyrics?! sigh. aniwaes, how the hell do ppl define rock nowadays. songs all sound the same. they are definitely pop music but they're trying too hard with guitars and drums to sound rock. i'm getting SICK of it. i guess i shall stick to RnB for now until this misconception clears.sigh. some things are just better off left unsaid isnt it? haiz. two weeks to the end of the sch yr. funny how time flew past us. i still rmb alisha and i were talking abt this. and she said tis yr was lyk taking a bullet train. then nxt yr will bcum rocket. then in sec 3? gahs. BLINK OF AN EYE. sigh. i wun be staying in SY that's for sure. sigh. sigh. sigh. a year ago, zi wei and i would be screaming our heads off in parkway. screaming hallelujah for finishing PSLE. sigh. it's as though it just happened yesterday.. but it seems so distant and the same time. i'm so not making sense. so many ppl have changed in this short three hundred and sixty-five days. the ones who never wore skirts and dreaded long hair has changed. she donned a skirt the day we returned to TNS. the ones whom i thought were cool enough to keep their head has already turned bimbotic. and me? i'm turning psycho. gahs. and my hair isnt helping either. it's lyk sorta a mark to show that i've no longer have qualms over layering my hair. gahs. i'm being less and less true to myself. or is it the other way round? am i realising myself only now or am i deceiving myself. sigh. literature makes you paranoid. sigh. i want to laugh at out own stupidity yet cry over it. some people do the wrong things and don't admit it. they even push the blame on others.. i DESPISE that. it even left her best friend deluded. her best friend seems to be used by her. to lie and to carry a cover. one day, we'll all expose you and show you how delusional you are. sigh. what's the use. some people think you're such a character of power but little do they now how truly despicable you are. we, the people who know, are so disgusted.
sheesh. the song believe me keeps ringing in my head. cant. get. it. out. damn. aniwaes. just to let you take a look at the lyrics..

Yeah
Like that that that that that & that

[Chorus]
I guess that this is where we've come to
If you don't want to, then you don't have to believe me
But I won't be there when you go down
Just so you know now
You're on your own now, believe me

[Ryu:]
Yo, I don't wanna be the one to blame
You like funny and games, keep playin' em
I'm just sayin'
Think back then we was like one and the same
On the right track, but I was on the wrong train
It's like that, now you gotta face the pain
And the devil's got a fresh new place to play
In your brain like a maze you can never escape
The reign, every damn day's the same shade of grey

[Mike:]
Hey,
I used to have a little bit of a plan
Used to, have a concept of where I stand
But that concept slipped right outta my hand
Now, I dont really even know who I am
Yo, what do I have to say, maybe
I should do what I have to do to break free and
Whatever happens to u, we'll see
But its not gonna happen with me

[Chorus]
I guess that this is where we've come to
If you don't want to, then you don't have to believe me
But I won't be there when you go down
Just so you know now
You're on your own now, believe me

[Mike:]
Back then, I thought you were just like me
Somebody who could see all the pain I see
But you proved to me unintentionally
That you would self-destruct eventually
Now I'm thinkin like the mistake that I made doesn't hurt
But its not gonna work cause its
Really much worse than I thought
I wished you were something you were not
And now this guilt is really all that I've got

[Tak:]
You turned your back and walk away ashamed
All you got is the memory and pain, nothing makes sense
You stare at the ground, like hearin my voice inside your head when no one else is around
What do I have to say
Maybe I should do what I have to do to break free
Whatever happens to you, we'll see
But its not gonna happen with me

[Chorus]
I guess that this is where we've come to
If you don't want to, then you don't have to believe me
But I won't be there when you go down
Just so you know now
You're on your own now, believe me

[Drum Solo]

YEAH
Go!

I'm guess that this is where we've come to
[Yeah]
If you don't want to, then you don't have to believe me
But I won't be there when you go down
[Yeah]
Just so you know now
You're on your own now, believe me

I'm doin' what I have to do
You're on your own now believe me
Whatever happens to you
You're on your own now believe me
What do I have to say
You're on your own now believe me
It's not gonna happen to me
You're on your own now believe me
-Fort Minor [Believe Me]

who frigging understands. no one cares. no one bothers. that force of pressure down under and up above. it;s all asscociated with only one word. HATE. i feel lyk killing a whole bunch of people. somebody go get a knife kill them all. plunging it right into their hearts and pulling it out. doing that repeatedly and let them hang over the railing. let the blood go drip, drip drip. sheesh. dammit. what the hell is wrong with me. i need tranquilisers. seriously. aniwaes, there's just so much i have to say but i cant put it in words. it jus plain sucks. the world sucks. and i pity all the mortals suffering on it. including me.

IT'S OVER.
goodness me. it's so fast. the last paper is GONE! higher chinese paper was not ass difficult as i had thought it would be. woohoo. elated. overjoyed. practically over the moon. tralalala. i went to yichieh's hse after the exam, then arranged to meet elaine and went off to orchard.. we ate at subway. goodness me. hahas. we jus went arnd far east plaza for a while.. guess what. i saw those voodoo-doll-like keychains. i guess it's a franchise then? aniwaes, after that, we all over the place. gahs. dammit. out of so many places wat did i spend money on? a notebook and lunch. lols. interesting sia. the reason we walked all over was because yichieh wanted to get something for her friend and her sister. after tt, we saw olinda cho walking past in the our opposite direction. dammit. she walked pass so quickly. and the guy walking next to her looked lyk taufik but we doubted it. aniwaes, when she walked past us in the underpass, everyone going in the same direction as us seemed to stop and turned their heads. like us, i suppose, they were all as surprised.
aniwaes, we met yichieh's friend at taka. then we went over to heeren and took a few neoprints. goodness. yichieh's friend was so pissed at the ppl who had a turn before us, that she was lyk swearing at them hahas. aniwaes, since today's the last paper, marking days officially start tmr. so thr wun be sch for tmr and friday. so friday, i'll go watch CORPSE BRIDE wit alisha!! 2 more days. YEAHH.
as for now, i shall go and talk. gahs. hopefully stay till past midnight!!

one more day!

yes yes. one more day to freedom. today was maths and english. maths was the darnest paper i've done nxt to geography. according to mr teo while he invigilated my class for english paper today, he said tt the failure rate for other classes were quite high. worry, yiting, worry. sigh. for maths paper I, i cldnt finish it on time. actually i kinda finished it but tt was a crap ans. stupid algebraic equation. damn. i mite fail the first paper. GAHS. for part II it wasnt so bad.. i finished wit only bloody 5 mins to spare. OH NO. gahs. aniwaes, english paper was quite alrite.. the duration for the paper was lyk 1.5hrs and i finished my paper in lyk 40mins.. gahs. check, doodle, sleep, wait. all in the remaining 50 mins. okay. so today wasnt so bad. but tmr? sheesh. i dun tink i'm gonna finish the chinese paper in time.. 1hr40mins for FOUR frigging comprehensions and TWO cloze passages. damn. damn. damn. GOODNESS. i'm starting to WORRY. woah. this is a HUGE achievement. sniff the sarcasm ppl. aniwaes. had a haircut. gahs. i look weird. so frigging SHORT. okayy it's not THAT short but still.. SHORT.
aniwaes. i kinda had a hunch tt most ppl wun be able to go out to kbox tmr so i had myself prepared aniwaes. i'm mite be going out to yichieh's hse and then elaine wld come over and meet us then perhaps go to orchard or smthn. i kinda dun wanna go out. lalala. i need to SLACK. sigh. free me. maybe i'll go call and tell her tt i'm not going. sigh. i need to learn how to scrimp and save. lols. or i'll be broke by FRIDAY, which isnt GOOD!!
chants CORPSE BRIDE. CORPSE BRIDE. CORPSE BRIDE. CORPSE BRIDE. CORPSE BRIDE. yes yes. i've gone nutty. arh heck.

hmm. one more exam down. all i have for exams left are my maths, higher chinese and english. science totally rocked today sia. it was easier than most of us had expected it to be. for once, willa and i wanna thank mrs kee. lols. aniwaes. i was so blur and forgot to bring calculator again. dammit. tmr's maths paper if i forget, i'll DIE for my paper II. sheesh. aniwaes, so i borrowed the calculator from jingyu. kinda everywhere senior. wat was horrid is that when were taking the pledge, i noticed i hadnt worn my badge. darn. so i had to get frm jeannette.. sigh. i forgot a lot of things sia. i also forgot my pencil so i had to use tt blunt pencil frm my compass. gahs.
aniwaes. somehow, i'm down with tt bloody headache again. sigh, seriously, wat's wrong with my head. i jus stoned on my bed and the next thing i knew, was tt i had fallen asleep for 2hrs plus. goodness me. then when i woke up, i was lyk swaying from side to side. gahs.
aniwaes. my brother's going taiwan tmr. so it means after the wednesday exmas, i can go online all i want! well i suppose? hahas. aniwaes. i'd just went to wei jia's blog. the queerest thing i saw was tt a person lyk bt would actually wanna handle a blog. lols. i hated the song, i still do actually. aniwaes, her links and her tagboard was so FARAWAYYYY.. sigh.
arhhh. cant wait till wednesday. freedom day. then on the marking days i will be free.. free to go NUTS. lalalala. i'm telling you i'll most likely be BROKE by the end of this week if elaine and yichieh wanna go kBox. gahs. dammit. i'm kinda resenting for agreeing cos i tink a long sleep would do me better with my headache. and i dread the smell of liquor and cigarettes there. ARGH. sigh.
anyways nadine, if u're reading this. my father's seriously thinking of going to melbourne at the end of the year. hahas. i'm forcing him to make us drop by glen waverly if we are going thr.. aniwaes, he was thinking if i could lyk stayover at ur hse? hahas. eh not a bad idea hurh? hahaha.. he's main reason for going thr i think it's cos he's ex-schmate migrated thr. hmm. wun be bad if i stayed over rite? then maybe the next time u come bck to SG then ur parents can dump u over at my place. hahas. i'm so evil.. dump. hahas. ok, will talk to u abt it when he confirms alrite?

oohlalar~!~
changed blog url again. just after anthr new blogskin. it has occured to most of us tt my prev url wasnt quite appropriate for my blogskin. hahas. anyway, feeling less suicidal now. no scars, no cuts.
anyways. i'm supposed to be studying arent i? and what am i doing? i'm online when i'm not going for ballet while ppl lyk cheerene, alisha are slogging their guts out doing free pointe at ms lee's class now. hehs. sorry larhs. i'm going to study my science soon..

wiy834hker8

okay. i shall not crap. goodbye ((:

hahas. i'm on the fone wit u again now sia. oh yeahh. betris' keychain totally rocks. dammit. one day we shld seriously think of doing a sha-tingg yeahh. hahas.
let's talk abt wat i did online ytd. thanks to deborah lim, i've finally gotten the song hollaback girl by gwen stefani. hehs. the place's codes for other rock music. sad. lols. aniwaes. so i managed to change my blogskin ytd. i lurve the new skin leaving out tt "kiss me" and "angel" thing which thanks to my "selective vision", i was unable to see that. but i love the colours. duncha my bolster-fruit? hehs. now my tagboard is lyk so damn colourful. you know what. it seems lyk it has been so long since i last had a striking blogskin. thanks to ruici, nadine, deb, betris, boon and esp my fellow sadist 'tardd for tagging. damn `sha's so nice to spam my board wit me lols. and dammit woman. u're trying to get back at me for calling u and brandon an entertaining pair rite?! WHATEVER MANN. hehs.
so ms lee came late ytd and we grd sevens lyk totally messed up ur class today. i jus noticed smthn. deborah lee sing-ling ponned class again today. sigh. i'm ponning class tmr. gahs. need to study for science!! desperately. hehs.
so today ms lee din really teach today. dammit. faith was such a horrible jnr. damnit. i din knw thr were so many ppl frm tns in the grd three's class. OMG. it's scary sia. i mean lyk. FOUR of them and i din knw them. OMG OMG OMG. hahas. i'm such an "embracing" senior. i was so bloody happy.. bubble-tea din come today. u knw her 2 other friends are so much better without her around.. dun u think so too?
whatever alisha. i lyk WEDNESDAY addams better than uncle fester. hehs. it's cool he blows himself up but wednesday looks lyk a dead doll. omg. so damn cool hehs.
alrite. so we decide on watching corpse bride at TP rite? then going over to ur hse rite. eh one thing. what tym do u wanna catch it at? oh have u asked ur mum aniwaes? if she dun allow then i jus go ovr to ur hse already good enuf rite? maybe u mite need to fetch me frm the bedok interchange or smthn lols.
aniwaes. i dun get how people can get hooked on maple.. gahs. all u kill are lyk mushrooms, monkeys and SNAILS? gahs. horny mushrooms.. gahs. it sounds damn bloody WRONG. and the blue mushrooms?! they should seriously get a DIET. darn it. it's so FAT and CHUBBY. goodness me. DIET BLUE MUSHROOMS. DIET.
lalala i'm bored. shall stop blogging now. hehs. buaiis.

woah. so fast. it's the end of the week already. wednesday and thursday's papers were kinda ok.. but today, even tho it was only one paper, it's sucked. the geog paper was a killer. maybe bcos i din study? hurh? lols. i cant really be bothered. i shall be nice to alisha's eyes today and type in GREEN. green is GOOD for ur EYES. i'm so bloody NICE. hehs. so i went to junction 8 again wit elaine and yi chieh after the geog paper. we ate at mos burger.. cos when we reached there, apparently the shops werent open yet.. those RJC uniform camouflaged wit the mos burger counter. how fascinating. when we turned to look it seemed lyk the only thing u can notice are their heads. hahas.
after tt, elaine wanted to take neoprints. so go lorh. wun die rite?
aniwaes, we only took frm one machine. most of the time was wasted on destroying the background of the neoprint. hehs. damn. we all looked spastic. gahs. soon yi chieh had to leave.. elaine and i was at this shop arnd the 1st level looking at stuff. she was looking for those black stud earrings while i was searching for those voodoo doll-like keychains that were on display outside. lols. after searching high and low, i finally found it. hehs. i got one of those stuff. the best thing is tt it's BLACK, WHITE and RED. WOOHOO. okay whatever.
yeah so it's one, two three, four, five, six papers down [ including oral ], and we have lyk how many more? four more. higher chinese, english, maths and science. gah. all the primary sch subjects. damn i'm so gonna die for my chinese. 2 cloze passages and 4 comprehensions. a really nice way of killing us slowly.. cos we only have lyk wat? 2 hrs to finish them. DARN HECK. aiyah wtv larhs. i'm looking forwards for nxt wednesday after the last exam. WOOT.